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Born: 1958 Weight: 132 lbs. Special: Tiger Punch Hairstyle: Diaper Mustache: Cheshire Scruples: M.I.A. Jewelry: Treasonous Stomach: Paper Mache Great Tiger doesn't have a lot of friends. In fact, he may be the least popular fighter in the entire WVBA. It may just be culture differences, considering his nearest WVBA neighbors are from Pacific Islands or countries named after Thanksgiving. The fact that he looks like the leader of a fundamentalist terror group also doesn't help, nor does the photo above where it appears that Tiger is wearing a breast plate. Perhaps most annoyingly, Tiger is pretty cocky. His boasts seem rather misguided if you ask me, considering that his only claim to fame from before was being the #1 contender in the Major Circuit. So you beat a 95 pound sissy with a rose between his lips and a giant bowl of butter who couldn't keep his shorts on. Congratulations. You might as well cock off about how you can breathe without thinking about it and how your whole family has been bipedal going all the way back to your grandfather. |
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Origins Magic is a pretty strange thing. I'm not just talking about the things that it can accomplish, but also what the possessors decide to do with it. Some people use magic to communicate with the dead, others use it to make a killing in Las Vegas, and some geniuses use their powers to tell me what cards I am holding so I don't have to go through the time-consuming process of "looking." Great Tiger decided that his best use of magic would be to bust people up. This actually went against his family tradition. His father had planned to use his powers to summon some rock soldiers from Dimension X to drive out the British. But in what will go down as one of the more curious decisions in world history, the public decided to follow a starving man sitting in a street rather than choose to fight alongside some cyborgs who would eventually become enemies of the Ninja Turtles (Ninja Turtles, now THAT'S magic.)
WVBA I Great Tiger's run in the first WVBA was a career of "what-ifs." The guy clearly had the biggest advantage with his abilities to teleport and his magical toughness that made him immune to knockouts. Perhaps it was his lack of organized fighting experience or years of malnutrition, but he never quite developed what insiders would call a "flawless repertoire." Yes, the man could teleport. Yes, he could never get knocked out. Yes, he was kind enough to signal to his opponent every time he wanted to punch. The jewel on his turban was a trusty Benedict Arnold for each one of his opponents, flashing moments before each one of his punches. It was suspected that the powers of his magic were so strong that they caused the jewel to flash when he was about to unload a jab. Of course, if his magic was that omnipotent, it should have guided him into picking some better ring fashion than a pair of stretch pants and an ornamental Judas for his headgear. If that wasn't bad enough, his Tiger Punch was as unpredictable as what direction the sun is going to set in tonight. While his teleporting from the corner to the center of the ring might have struck terror into his opponents, they had ample time to reassure themselves by petting a puppy and blowing kisses to their mothers while they nonchalantly blocked Tiger's spin-cycle punch o'terribleness. WVBA II It's pretty sad, but most of the fighters in the WVBA are a lot dumber than seven year-olds from 1988. Case in point, when Little Mac was being forcefully controlled on the TV screen, defeating the Tiger Punch was as difficult as determining Doc Louis's feelings on the Nintendo Fun Club. But now that he's back on his own, he, like all the others, is pretty much clueless as to what to do about it. That could spell many victories for Great Tiger.
Doc Louis "To be honest, I've never talked to Great Tiger. One time I put my hand into what I thought was a cookie jar, ya know, and his mystically compacted body was sleeping in there. That's the closest thing to talking to him I've done. All's I know is that the guy is some kooky witch doctor from Lithuania or something and I'm going to give that brother his space. You've seen the things they can do to you with voodoo dolls, right? Richard Simmons crossed one of those bastards. 'Nuff said, bro, 'nuff said." Leonardite "You're real tough, Great Tiger. Just because you made Calvin cry by scalping Hobbes doesn't mean that I don't see through your little charade. Go on and teleport here or spin around like crazy over there, it makes no difference to me. If you can transform your face into having a post-1934 mustache, then we'll talk." WVBA II Match History
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